This post might be considered politically incorrect, but challenging the status quo has always been my specialty, dating back to my teenage years when I would graffiti on communist statues many decades ago. I’ve been doing a lot of reflecting lately, looking back on over 30 years of learning working in the area of eating distress/eating disorders (ED). We started to share our reflections and our learning in our substack – Calling It out, but today I would like to share some of my learning here on Mad in Ireland, a website which I find very motivational, honest and refreshing.
I’ve realised that if I want to share genuinely helpful insights, many of them will need to break away from conventional narratives and may come across as politically incorrect. But these thoughts are grounded in real experiences.
Progress and pitfalls in area of treatment of ED
The landscape of mental health has changed significantly since the days when I was caught up in destructive eating distress/eating disorders (ED) behaviours. Many changes have been positive and beneficial, but there are also shifts that keep us trapped in cycles of victimhood, inadvertently glorifying being unwell. While many professionals and advocates mean well and genuinely want to help, we have to ask ourselves:
Is it truly effective? Despite an overwhelming amount of literature and discussions on ED, sometimes too much talk and very little action. Why is it that recovery seems to take longer nowadays? Why are so many people choosing to live with EDs rather than striving for full recovery?
Choosing staying in ED over recovery
I remember a poignant session from eight years ago when a client candidly told me she was choosing to live with her ED instead of recovering. It was the first time I heard someone verbalise this choice so openly. Previously, there seemed to be more determination to push through challenges and fight for recovery. I can personally relate to how daunting the recovery journey can be. I vividly recall the days when I would hide in bookstores, nervously flipping through indexes for words like “Anorexia” or “Bulimia”, the words emotional eating wasn’t used at that time at all, yet. The shame I felt was so intense that it seemed like everyone around me was silently judging me though in reality, the bookstore was empty, and the only eyes on me were my own fears.
The changing landscape of ED support
Today, the narrative has shifted from shame to a “badge of honour.” Social media and various platforms are filled with people discussing how hard recovery is, how governments have failed them, and how misunderstood they feel due to a lack of funding and support. I still remember decades ago reading an article that said, “We only have 3 beds available.” I was once in one of those beds, having admitted myself in a desperate bid to get better, yearning for someone to understand me. Instead, all I got was a focus on my weight, something that Weight Watchers could have easily provided. I didn’t need the ED consultant to tell me that. Has anything truly changed? Clients still tell me about specialised clinics where young people are weighed and their recovery is judged based solely on numbers. Are these scales, perhaps run by AI, magically supposed to measure one’s progress in recovery? Often, not even basic blood tests are conducted. Is this what we call progress?
Questioning awareness campaigns
Do all these “awareness days” actually help? Who is organising them, professional fundraisers or individuals with a genuine understanding of the issues? Maybe what we really need is a Common Sense Awareness Day, a Personal Responsibility Awareness Day, or a Learning from Challenges Awareness Day. The reality is that many of these programs, which emphasise suffering, end up glorifying it. In all my years of working intensely with people in recovery from ED, I have yet to meet someone who truly benefits from publicly sharing how hard their journey is on various platforms before they are actually working on their mental health issues. If anything, it reinforces a kind of celebrity status around the struggle, which paradoxically extends their recovery period.
The dangers of unfiltered media sharing
People sharing their stories in the media should be fully recovered or really willing, learning and practicing their recovery; otherwise, we are merely hearing their conditioned thinking.
If someone with an ED knew exactly what was helpful for them, they likely wouldn’t be suffering from it in the first place. Unfortunately, individuals struggling with EDs are often exploited by others seeking to sensationalise their stories, ultimately to the detriment of the person sharing. It is more about the next article or next film, not always what is best for the person’s recovery.
A call to rethink our approach
We need to critically assess whether the current methods of raising awareness and supporting recovery are truly effective. Are we empowering individuals to reclaim their lives, or are we inadvertently validating their illnesses? It’s time to shift the focus from glorifying the struggle to genuinely supporting sustainable recovery. We can motivate people how to value their experiences and how to learn from their hardship without adding to a person’s suffering. Constantly talking about hardships and how hard and fearful is not the solution. Promoting and talking more about how to make the process easier and how people deserve a better and lighter way of thinking and coping with life, would be more beneficial and helpful. Experiencing hardship in life is inevitable. Learning from our struggles is essential for personal growth. No one chooses to develop an eating disorder (ED); it often emerges subconsciously. However, it is crucial to encourage those suffering to take steps toward recovery, helping them realise that overcoming hardship can lead to resilience and strength.